"Do not be misled: 'Bad company corrupts good character.' "
1 Corinthians 15:33
I'd love to write a nice, cushy, feel-good post this week, but that's not on the agenda.
Sadly, I had to cut loose someone from my life earlier this month. This person (I'll call him "Dudley" since I don't actually know anyone by that name) was someone who was introduced into my life several years ago while I was in a very toxic relationship. Unfortunately, this toxic relationship brought with it a lot of toxic associations. After I ended that relationship to preserve my own sanity and health (physical and spiritual), I had to start the painful process of extracting all of the toxic people from my life that I had acquired as part of that relationship.
Dudley was the last person that I needed to let go. He managed to hang on long after all the others had been lovingly but firmly shown the exit door of my life. Somehow, every time I thought he had just simply vanished into oblivion, suddenly he would resurface and charm his way back into my graces. If you've been around long enough, you've probably had one or two Dudleys in your life. You know the type: they take and take and take and never give back. They manage to suck the life and energy out of you (and your resources if possible), and then make you feel guilty when you have nothing left to give them. I like to refer to such people as social vampires. They bleed you dry and then move on to their next victim.
Dudley came with a disproportionate sense of entitlement. He had a rough life, and therefore decided that the world owed him something. If he had a need, it was the obligation of those around him to provide for that need, without expecting anything in return. And if you didn't give it to him quickly enough or on his terms, he would simply help himself to what he needed.
It was during one of these times, the last time he was a guest in my home, that I finally realized just how much of a taker Dudley was. I literally caught him making an unauthorized withdrawal from my wallet (he would never call it stealing). Rather than make a big scene and risk unnecessary drama, I asked him to gather his things and I drove him back to his home. I used the excuse that his presence was bothering my dog Buddy (it was). Apparently Buddy is a much better judge of character than I - he never liked Dudley from the day they first met.
Once I dropped Dudley back at his home, I discontinued all forms of communication with him. No emails, no phone calls, no texts, no facebook. His attempts to contact me were ignored, and eventually he quit trying after about a week. His early messages feigned ignorance as to why I was ignoring him. I guess he finally accepted the fact that I knew the score, and he had lost the game.
Even though I knew he had taken advantage of me more times than I cared to admit, this was still a hard thing to do. It's been hard every time I've had to cut someone out of my life. I tend to be a fairly private person, so when I take you into my inner circle of friends, I consider you part of my extended family. So when it becomes necessary to remove you from my family, it hurts me as much as it hurts you.
But God never called us to be doormats and patsies. Jesus taught His disciples that they should shake the dust from their feet if they were met inhospitably as they traveled about from town to town. There are times when we have to turn our backs on people that we genuinely care about if they become a hindrance to our well-being, our families or our ministries. It's called tough love. God expects us to use our time, talents and resources where they will produce an abundant harvest. To squander them on people who will produce nothing but weeds and thorns is counterproductive and ineffective. In Matthew 7:6, Jesus said, "Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces."
I don't know what Dudley is doing now, and frankly, I really don't care. He claims to know the Lord (and I believe he does), so I'll let God take care of him going forward. I need to focus on people in my life where I can make a real difference.
If you have a toxic person in your life, you need to give yourself permission to let him or her go. In the long run, you will do both yourself and the other person a favor. By releasing your "Dudley", you free him or her to make some hard decisions about how they are living their life and using people (trust me, if he is using you, he's using others also). Yes, it is hard. Yes, it is painful. But it is necessary so you can have that weight around your neck removed and you can get about the business of living your life the way God meant for you to live it.
Maybe next week I'll write about puppies and rainbows. Or not.
Have a blessed week!
Pastor David
Sunday, February 24, 2013
Sunday, February 17, 2013
Removing Rocks
"That same day Jesus went out of the house and sat by the lake. Such large crowds gathered around him that he got into a boat and sat in it, while all the people stood on the shore. Then he told them many things in parables, saying: “A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants. Still other seed fell on good soil, where it produced a crop—a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown."
Matthew 13:1-8
I've been thinking about rocky soil lately. You see, my house was built 63 years ago, and has had many owners prior to my purchase in 1996. At some point, a previous owner decided that it would be a great idea to cover the entire property with black plastic and pea gravel. At some point after that, another previous owner decided that they didn't like the gravel and covered the entire property in topsoil and grass. By the time I purchased the home, the "lawn" had been badly neglected for quite some time, and all that remained was a lot of dirt and weeds, and a few grassy patches that refused to die.
Well, I landscaped the front yard in a quasi-desert motif with some hearty shades trees and numerous flowering shrubs and ground cover, and about 27 tons of rock. The idea was to minimize the amount of maintenance (and water) required to keep the front yard looking presentable.
The back yard was a different story. Shortly after purchasing the house, I acquired a dog, Tabitha. Tabitha was a great dog, and she occupied a place in my home and my heart for 15 1/2 years. But Tabitha spent a lot of time in the back yard, which was still mostly dirt and weeds. Needless to say, much of that dirt found its way into my house. My solution was to start watering the back yard in hopes that the lawn would revive and I would end up with more grass than dirt. My plan worked. It turns out that, given enough water, grass will grow just about anywhere.
But something unexpected occurred. Every time it rained or I watered heavily, all these little rocks would surface. Over the years, erosion had cause much of the topsoil to dissipate, and the gravel beneath would percolate to the surface every time the ground became wet. Eventually I had a very rocky yard, but still relatively grassy, as long as I kept up with the watering.
Fast forward to last year, when I acquired two new puppies, Buddy and Molly. To say that Buddy and Molly play very roughly would be an understatement. Their mode of play resembles something you would see on National Geographic during elk mating season. A casual observer would think that these dogs hate each other and are dueling to the death. They leap at each other and impact in mid-air, they throw each other to the ground, and race around the yard like a couple of greyhounds chasing a mechanical rabbit. This goes on for hours at a time, and has taken its toll on the yard. Within the span of about six months, they managed to destroy nearly all of the grass in the back yard, leaving nothing but bare dirt and rocks. And once again, all that dirt finds its way into my home.
So I am in the process of trying to reclaim my yard (and my sanity) be replacing all of the grass in the back yard, one puppy-free section at a time. However, in order to ensure a healthy lawn that hopefully will withstand the rigors of puppy olympics, I am systematically sifting out all of the gravel from the ground so I only have clean topsoil left, allowing the grass to develop a deeper root system.
So yes, I've been thinking a lot about rocky ground lately, as I haul away wheelbarrow after wheelbarrow full of gravel (I think I've already moved at least a ton or more - all by hand). Which brings me to the parable Jesus taught about the farmer.One of the places where the seed fell was on rocky soil. The seed sprang up quickly, but was also quickly scorched and died because it lacked roots. Later in that passage, Jesus tells his disciples:
"The seed falling on rocky ground refers to someone who hears the word and at once receives it with joy. But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away." (Matthew 13:20-21)
He further tells us that the seed that fell on good soil produced an abundant harvest. If we correlate the soil to the condition of our hearts, this provides a valuable lesson. If I want an abundant harvest of God's word in my life, I need to have a heart free from rocks that make it difficult for the seed to grow and thrive. So I began wondering what those "rocks" are that we tend to carry around in our hearts. In Ephesians 4:31, The Apostle Paul mentions some of these rocks:
"Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice."
If we harbor bitterness in our hearts; if we allow rage and anger to control our emotions; if we actively engage in useless arguments and careless speech; if we take joy in making life difficult for those around us, we have rocky hearts, and the word of God cannot take root in our lives. In Colossians 3:8-9, he adds filthy language and lying to the list. Never underestimate the power of the tongue; words rashly spoken can never be reclaimed. Relationships have been destroyed and wars have been started over careless words.
I'm sure there are many other examples of "rocks" in our lives. I know the ones I need to remove. What about you? What rocks reside in your heart which prevent you from fully enjoying the abundant harvest of God's word in your life?
I come from a faith tradition that did not observe Lent, but I know that many believers around the world are currently observing this solemn time of reflection. Perhaps this is the ideal time for us to examine ourselves and root out those rocks that lie just below the surface of our hearts, waiting to pop up and rob us of God's blessings. With every load of gravel that I haul out of my yard, I ask God to help me remove the rocks in my heart that still remain. May we all have pure hearts where the seed can flourish and grow.
Have a blessed week!
Pastor David
Matthew 13:1-8
I've been thinking about rocky soil lately. You see, my house was built 63 years ago, and has had many owners prior to my purchase in 1996. At some point, a previous owner decided that it would be a great idea to cover the entire property with black plastic and pea gravel. At some point after that, another previous owner decided that they didn't like the gravel and covered the entire property in topsoil and grass. By the time I purchased the home, the "lawn" had been badly neglected for quite some time, and all that remained was a lot of dirt and weeds, and a few grassy patches that refused to die.
Well, I landscaped the front yard in a quasi-desert motif with some hearty shades trees and numerous flowering shrubs and ground cover, and about 27 tons of rock. The idea was to minimize the amount of maintenance (and water) required to keep the front yard looking presentable.
The back yard was a different story. Shortly after purchasing the house, I acquired a dog, Tabitha. Tabitha was a great dog, and she occupied a place in my home and my heart for 15 1/2 years. But Tabitha spent a lot of time in the back yard, which was still mostly dirt and weeds. Needless to say, much of that dirt found its way into my house. My solution was to start watering the back yard in hopes that the lawn would revive and I would end up with more grass than dirt. My plan worked. It turns out that, given enough water, grass will grow just about anywhere.
But something unexpected occurred. Every time it rained or I watered heavily, all these little rocks would surface. Over the years, erosion had cause much of the topsoil to dissipate, and the gravel beneath would percolate to the surface every time the ground became wet. Eventually I had a very rocky yard, but still relatively grassy, as long as I kept up with the watering.
Fast forward to last year, when I acquired two new puppies, Buddy and Molly. To say that Buddy and Molly play very roughly would be an understatement. Their mode of play resembles something you would see on National Geographic during elk mating season. A casual observer would think that these dogs hate each other and are dueling to the death. They leap at each other and impact in mid-air, they throw each other to the ground, and race around the yard like a couple of greyhounds chasing a mechanical rabbit. This goes on for hours at a time, and has taken its toll on the yard. Within the span of about six months, they managed to destroy nearly all of the grass in the back yard, leaving nothing but bare dirt and rocks. And once again, all that dirt finds its way into my home.
So I am in the process of trying to reclaim my yard (and my sanity) be replacing all of the grass in the back yard, one puppy-free section at a time. However, in order to ensure a healthy lawn that hopefully will withstand the rigors of puppy olympics, I am systematically sifting out all of the gravel from the ground so I only have clean topsoil left, allowing the grass to develop a deeper root system.
So yes, I've been thinking a lot about rocky ground lately, as I haul away wheelbarrow after wheelbarrow full of gravel (I think I've already moved at least a ton or more - all by hand). Which brings me to the parable Jesus taught about the farmer.One of the places where the seed fell was on rocky soil. The seed sprang up quickly, but was also quickly scorched and died because it lacked roots. Later in that passage, Jesus tells his disciples:
"The seed falling on rocky ground refers to someone who hears the word and at once receives it with joy. But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away." (Matthew 13:20-21)
He further tells us that the seed that fell on good soil produced an abundant harvest. If we correlate the soil to the condition of our hearts, this provides a valuable lesson. If I want an abundant harvest of God's word in my life, I need to have a heart free from rocks that make it difficult for the seed to grow and thrive. So I began wondering what those "rocks" are that we tend to carry around in our hearts. In Ephesians 4:31, The Apostle Paul mentions some of these rocks:
"Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice."
If we harbor bitterness in our hearts; if we allow rage and anger to control our emotions; if we actively engage in useless arguments and careless speech; if we take joy in making life difficult for those around us, we have rocky hearts, and the word of God cannot take root in our lives. In Colossians 3:8-9, he adds filthy language and lying to the list. Never underestimate the power of the tongue; words rashly spoken can never be reclaimed. Relationships have been destroyed and wars have been started over careless words.
I'm sure there are many other examples of "rocks" in our lives. I know the ones I need to remove. What about you? What rocks reside in your heart which prevent you from fully enjoying the abundant harvest of God's word in your life?
I come from a faith tradition that did not observe Lent, but I know that many believers around the world are currently observing this solemn time of reflection. Perhaps this is the ideal time for us to examine ourselves and root out those rocks that lie just below the surface of our hearts, waiting to pop up and rob us of God's blessings. With every load of gravel that I haul out of my yard, I ask God to help me remove the rocks in my heart that still remain. May we all have pure hearts where the seed can flourish and grow.
Have a blessed week!
Pastor David
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Never Abandoned or Forsaken
"The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."
Deuteronomy 31:8
As some of you may know, I am a volunteer handler for a dog rescue organization here in Phoenix. Every Sunday afternoon, I join my fellow volunteers for an adoption event at a local pet supply store and get the pleasure of working with numerous dogs waiting for their forever homes. Because I am a male, by default I get to hold the big dogs that are too much for the women to handle. Sexist, sure. But I love what I do, and believe that I am somehow contributing to the welfare of these poor creatures. (I still sneak in some cuddle time with the little dogs whenever I can.)
It saddens me every time I hear the story of how we acquired a new dog. Most of our dogs are pulled off of the euthanasia lists at animal shelters and pounds throughout the state. These are the adoptable ones who have run out of time and will be put down if no one claims them. Many of these animals are beautiful, healthy, vibrant creatures with tons of love to give away. I have to admit that I have fallen in love with several of them over the months that I have been doing this work. I would take them all home if I could (and be the neighborhood "crazy dog dude"), but that would not be practical or responsible.
Just last week, we acquired a beautiful 10-year-old female shepherd/lab mix named Aysha. Her family moved to Australia and couldn't take her with them. So, rather than finding a suitable home for their beloved pet, they simply left her behind. I honestly can't even begin to imagine how you decide to abandon your family pet after caring for her for 10 years, as if she was an extra piece of furniture that you no longer require. All she wants is for someone to love her and provide a safe clean environment for her to enjoy for her few remaining years. Sadly, her story is not unlike the stories of many of our dogs, whose owners could not (or chose not to) care for their pets any longer, and simply dropped them off at the nearest shelter, or worse. We have dogs who have been left in parks, parking lots, foreclosed houses. Dogs who never did anything to deserve being left to fend for themselves.
Needless to say, I think about the topic of abandonment a lot as I work with these beautiful animals. Abandonment is actually something very near and dear to me, as I have struggled with lifelong abandonment issues (the details of which I will spare you). One of the most attractive and appealing things about being a follower of Christ is the promise that God will never abandon me. From the early pages of the Bible through the end, God's promise to remain faithful and present with us is repeated. Jesus reassured His disciples that He would not leave them as orphans, but would send the Holy Spirit to abide with them until He returns (John 14:17-19).
No matter what I do or where I go, God's presence is always with me. Even before I gave my life to Christ nearly 29 years ago, I sensed God watching over me. Indeed, there were many times when I placed myself in danger's path, only later to see the hand of God protecting me and preserving my life. If God knows before we are born that we will one day receive the free gift of salvation, then it only stands to reason that He doesn't wait until we make that decision to manifest His presence in our lives.
I love the fact that, in the above passage from Deuteronomy, God precedes His admonishment to not be afraid or discouraged with His promise to never abandon us. If He simply said, "Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged", we would be less inclined to see how that would be possible in light of all the hardships that we face in life. But knowing that He promises to always be with us along life's journey makes it easier to not be afraid or discouraged. In fact, I believe that the times when we are afraid or discouraged are exactly those times that we forget God's promise to never leave us or forsake us. If I truly believe that God is always with me, in good times and bad, in life's darkest moments as well as on the mountaintops, then I cannot allow myself to be afraid or discouraged. The comfort that comes from this reality is priceless.
I don't know if Aysha will find a forever home where she can once again be loved and cared for, or if she will spend her few remaining years in a kennel or a foster home. But I can say with certainty that I know that I have my forever home already secured. I have been chosen and adopted by a loving Father who knows exactly what I need and provides everything accordingly. I never have to worry about being abandoned or forsaken again. My prayer is that you also have this wonderful assurance.
Have a blessed week!
Pastor David
Deuteronomy 31:8
As some of you may know, I am a volunteer handler for a dog rescue organization here in Phoenix. Every Sunday afternoon, I join my fellow volunteers for an adoption event at a local pet supply store and get the pleasure of working with numerous dogs waiting for their forever homes. Because I am a male, by default I get to hold the big dogs that are too much for the women to handle. Sexist, sure. But I love what I do, and believe that I am somehow contributing to the welfare of these poor creatures. (I still sneak in some cuddle time with the little dogs whenever I can.)
It saddens me every time I hear the story of how we acquired a new dog. Most of our dogs are pulled off of the euthanasia lists at animal shelters and pounds throughout the state. These are the adoptable ones who have run out of time and will be put down if no one claims them. Many of these animals are beautiful, healthy, vibrant creatures with tons of love to give away. I have to admit that I have fallen in love with several of them over the months that I have been doing this work. I would take them all home if I could (and be the neighborhood "crazy dog dude"), but that would not be practical or responsible.
Just last week, we acquired a beautiful 10-year-old female shepherd/lab mix named Aysha. Her family moved to Australia and couldn't take her with them. So, rather than finding a suitable home for their beloved pet, they simply left her behind. I honestly can't even begin to imagine how you decide to abandon your family pet after caring for her for 10 years, as if she was an extra piece of furniture that you no longer require. All she wants is for someone to love her and provide a safe clean environment for her to enjoy for her few remaining years. Sadly, her story is not unlike the stories of many of our dogs, whose owners could not (or chose not to) care for their pets any longer, and simply dropped them off at the nearest shelter, or worse. We have dogs who have been left in parks, parking lots, foreclosed houses. Dogs who never did anything to deserve being left to fend for themselves.
Needless to say, I think about the topic of abandonment a lot as I work with these beautiful animals. Abandonment is actually something very near and dear to me, as I have struggled with lifelong abandonment issues (the details of which I will spare you). One of the most attractive and appealing things about being a follower of Christ is the promise that God will never abandon me. From the early pages of the Bible through the end, God's promise to remain faithful and present with us is repeated. Jesus reassured His disciples that He would not leave them as orphans, but would send the Holy Spirit to abide with them until He returns (John 14:17-19).
No matter what I do or where I go, God's presence is always with me. Even before I gave my life to Christ nearly 29 years ago, I sensed God watching over me. Indeed, there were many times when I placed myself in danger's path, only later to see the hand of God protecting me and preserving my life. If God knows before we are born that we will one day receive the free gift of salvation, then it only stands to reason that He doesn't wait until we make that decision to manifest His presence in our lives.
I love the fact that, in the above passage from Deuteronomy, God precedes His admonishment to not be afraid or discouraged with His promise to never abandon us. If He simply said, "Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged", we would be less inclined to see how that would be possible in light of all the hardships that we face in life. But knowing that He promises to always be with us along life's journey makes it easier to not be afraid or discouraged. In fact, I believe that the times when we are afraid or discouraged are exactly those times that we forget God's promise to never leave us or forsake us. If I truly believe that God is always with me, in good times and bad, in life's darkest moments as well as on the mountaintops, then I cannot allow myself to be afraid or discouraged. The comfort that comes from this reality is priceless.
I don't know if Aysha will find a forever home where she can once again be loved and cared for, or if she will spend her few remaining years in a kennel or a foster home. But I can say with certainty that I know that I have my forever home already secured. I have been chosen and adopted by a loving Father who knows exactly what I need and provides everything accordingly. I never have to worry about being abandoned or forsaken again. My prayer is that you also have this wonderful assurance.
Have a blessed week!
Pastor David
Sunday, January 27, 2013
It's Just Stuff
"At this, Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship and said: 'Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.' "
(Job 1:20-21)
On Thursday, January 10, while I was attending the opening night of the GCN conference here in Phoenix, my home was burglarized. As I pulled into the driveway shortly after midnight, I immediately felt there was something wrong. As soon as I put my key in the door, I knew someone had been in my house. My dogs were not there to greet me as they usually do, and the deadbolt had been unlocked. Lights throughout the house were on, doors that are usually closed when I am gone were open, and a sense of foreboding overcame me. I opened the back door and called for my dogs, who came running from the far end of the yard. I could tell that they were very upset and agitated.
Once I determined that they were safe and unharmed, I began to survey the house to determine what had occurred. The front part of the house seemed to be intact, but as I moved toward the back of the house, I suspected the worse, and justifiably so. The thief (thieves?) had pretty much cleaned out the back end of the house, taking anything of apparent value that they could carry. My office and bedroom were ransacked. A large empty space on my desk indicated that my laptop, large screen monitor, wireless keyboard and mouse, and web cam were gone. All that remained were abandoned power cords and cables. My digital camera was also gone (I knew I should have downloaded those photos - darn procrastination).
In my bedroom, one of my jewelry boxes was gone, and my jewelry cabinet was completely emptied of its contents. Gone were all of my watches, including the heirloom timepiece that my father gave me on my last visit to see him. My wedding ring was gone, along with all of my cuff links, tie tacks and tie bars, and various other items that I had accumulated or was given over the years. Most of my coin collections had been taken as well. Every closet and dresser drawer had been searched. Even the bedding had been pulled out in an attempt to see if I was hiding anything under the mattress.
Once I called the police, I had about an hour to process the situation before the officers finally arrived to conduct their investigation. By the time they were done, it was nearly 2:30 in the morning, and I was exhausted. All I kept thinking was, it could have been worse, and I was extremely grateful that my dogs weren't harmed. Oddly enough, I slept very well for the remainder of the night with my babies snuggled up close beside me.
The next morning, I felt that I was not in a good frame of mind to return to the conference, and I wanted to do a more thorough assessment of the situation in the daylight and after being a bit more rested. I texted a few close friends to let them know what had happened and why I wouldn't be at the conference, and they all responded with such incredible concern and compassion. As I was praying, I just burst into tears. Not because of the loss I had incurred, but because God has blessed me with such amazing friends. Their outpouring of love throughout the day overwhelmed me.
As I decompressed that morning, I kept hearing this thought in my head - "It's just stuff." I wish I could say that this is the first time I have been relieved of my possessions, but it wasn't. Over the years I have had numerous instances where people have seen fit to help themselves to my "stuff". And each time, I have been reminded that "it's just stuff." The passage from Job quoted above came to mind the other day. Even when faced with total ruin and the loss of everything that meant anything to Job, he still had the attitude that he came into the world with nothing and would leave with nothing, and that God gives and takes away as He pleases. In the end, the only acceptable response is to worship God.
For many years I have tried to maintain the attitude that everything I have belongs to God, and that He just lets me enjoy it for a season. Some seasons are longer than others, and they usually end without any advance notice. I have also observed that God usually replaces the things that go away with better things. But then, sometimes He doesn't replace them at all, a sign that I no longer needed them in my life (this applies to people as much as possessions). So in this current situation, I felt in my heart that maybe this was a way of cleaning the slate. Some of the "stuff" that had been stolen were things that I had been holding on to for too long, and needed to let go. At the end of the day, I still had what mattered most - my peace and my joy.
I resolved that this turn of events would not rob me of my peace or my joy. I quickly determined (and it was confirmed by a trusted friend that very day), that this was simply an attack of the enemy to try to ruin my experience at this conference. So I went back to the conference Friday evening to receive the blessings that I felt God had prepared for me. And I was blessed. Over and over for the next three days I was blessed, and I gladly received it. Those blessings came in the form of some dynamic worship services, but also in the continued outpouring of love and concern from those who knew what had happened. Usually I am the one who is the encourager and nurturer in my friendships; but this was my time to be encouraged and nurtured. God's love for me expressed through my friends was most evident, and extremely humbling.
I try to always see the silver lining in situations, and it's almost funny how the thieves managed to overlook certain items which have allowed me to quickly recover from this incident. I believe that God blinded them to the "stuff" that is important to me. Besides, I still have my home and my babies, and that is enough. God is good all the time.
Have a blessed week!
Pastor David
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Hello, 2013!
"See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland."
(Isaiah 43:19)
I was quite happy to bid adieu to 2011, and 2012 brought many positive experiences: I was able to travel to several events around the country and see old friends as well as make new ones; I adopted two puppies who have taken over my life; and I lost my job. As strange as that last item may seem in a list of "positive events", it has been an odd blessing for me. I have not felt this relaxed, rested and at peace in years. I have almost zero stress in my life for now, something I would have not anticipated, but gladly welcome.
In two days, we begin another year. What it holds remains to be seen. I posted the rest of this entry a year ago, and said I would post it again if the Mayas were wrong about the end of the world. Well, they were, so here it is.
Obviously,
there is nothing magical about turning the page of the calendar from
December 31 to January 1 that suddenly changes our lives. It's really
just another 24-hour day in a seemingly endless stream of days. But
psychologically, culturally, and even spiritually, there is something
significant about starting a new year that gives us hope for better
tomorrows and cleansing from yesterdays. A new year provides a
delineation between the old and the new, the past and the future. On
this one day of the year, we get to wipe our proverbial slates clean and
start all over. Of course, we get that opportunity every morning when
we wake up. Lamentations 3:23 tells us that God's compassions are "new
every morning", meaning that He gives us a clean tablet of life to write
on every day.
But
the new year is a BIG tablet - more like a giant storyboard, where we
get to set goals for ourselves (call them resolutions if you want). We
plan out a course of action that is designed to make our lives better
and more fulfilling, to make us better people and friends and family
members, and to give our lives a sense of structure and purpose. These
goals/resolutions should go beyond "I'm going to lose weight or stop
smoking or pay off my credit cards". They should have a much deeper
impact on who we are, not just what we do or how we look.
With that in mind, I present Eight Godly Resolutions for the New Year.
This is something I put in my church bulletins every year when I had my
church, and I've also shared them elsewhere over the years. They are
timeless because they are based on scriptural principles. and can be
applied to all of our lives, regardless of our personal circumstances.
They are also something that we never accomplish once and move on - they
require ongoing work to achieve and maintain - so you'll probably see
them here again next January, if Jesus tarries.
Have a safe, blessed and prosperous 2013!
Pastor David
Eight Godly Resolutions for the New Year
1. I
will destroy all roots of bitterness by forgiving those who have hurt
me and accepting forgiveness from others (Ephesians 4:29-32)
2. I will not be satisfied living on yesterday’s spiritual blessings and nourishment (Exodus 16:13-21)
3. I will make sure God is at the top of my priority list (Mark 12:28-31)
4. I will let my closest friends be those that will positively influence my walk with God (Psalm 1:1; Psalm 119:63)
5. I will seek to live at peace with everyone (Romans 12:16-18)
6. I will commit myself to serving others (Philippians 2:1- 4)
7. I will ask God for a renewed vision for lost souls (1 Corinthians 9:9-23)
8. I will ask God for new opportunities to witness to others (Colossians 4:2-6; 1 Peter 3:15)
Sunday, December 23, 2012
The Christmas That Never Came
"When
Herod realized that he had been outwitted by the Magi, he was furious,
and he gave orders to kill all the boys in Bethlehem and its vicinity
who were two years old and under, in accordance with the time he had
learned from the Magi. Then what was said through the prophet Jeremiah was fulfilled: 'A voice is heard in Ramah, weeping and great mourning, Rachel weeping for her children and refusing to be comforted, because they are no more.' "
(Matthew 2:16-18)
(Matthew 2:16-18)
Someone once said, "Let my heart be broken by the things that break the heart of God." I believe that God's heart was broken on the day that 20 children and six adults died needlessly at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut on Friday, December 14. Much has been said and written about this horrible tragedy, some comforting and some absolute rubbish.
I learned a long time ago that it is a dangerous thing to put words into God's mouth. My study of the Book of Job informs me that God is not required to give a reason for anything that happens in this world, and we can exhaust ourselves trying to figure out why such events occur when He chooses to remain silent.
I do not know, nor will I venture to guess, why those innocent children had to die that day. Children who most likely were looking forward to celebrating Christmas in less than two weeks. Christmas will never come for those kids. Every time I think about the parents who had to bury their babies this week, I try to empathize what they must be experiencing, and I can only come up with one response: tears. I have never been a parent (the closest I have come to parenting is raising dogs that I consider my children). I have no idea what it feels like to lose a child. What it must be like to look at their empty chair every evening during dinner. To miss the sound of their laughter at play. Not having to get them up in the morning and prepare them for school. Not being able to tuck them in at night and read them a bedtime story. But I do know one thing: there are countless tears, and will be for many years to come. And Christmas will never be the same again for dozens of Connecticut families.
The outrage and shock experienced by our nation in response to this event has me puzzled, however. Yes, it is a horrible thing and should have never happened. But thousands of children die every day around the world from starvation, disease and war. I think that we Americans are so outraged when something like Sandy Hook happens because these things happen so infrequently in our country. But in other parts of the world, childhood death is very much a part of life, and parents bury their babies all the time. Where is our outrage then? Or are we only outraged at the needless deaths of children when they are American? I believe that God weeps over every child that is robbed of his or her chance to live a full and productive life.
There have been numerous suggestions and discussions on how to prevent another Sandy Hook from happening, but I think those discussions are off track. As long as there is evil in this world, people will do horrible things like randomly shooting schoolchildren or movie-goers, flying airplanes into buildings, and storming embassies. We can pass all the laws we want, but these people don't follow the rules and will always find ways to carry out their crimes.
Don't get me wrong - I'm not taking a fatalistic approach to the problem and suggesting we sit back and accept this because it's going to happen anyway. I just don't want to settle for a knee-jerk solution that really doesn't solve anything. In every mass-shooting over the past several years in this country, the perpetrator had a history of mental problems that were never adequately addressed. The fact that guns are so easy to obtain in this country only made it easier for them to carry out their plans. But guns aren't the problem. The two worst terrorist attacks on American soil (Oklahoma City and 9/11) didn't involve a single bullet. The problem is much bigger than guns and bullets. We have evolved into a society where human life has been devalued, many people live in virtual isolation (how many of your neighbors do you know by name?), and mental illness is still swept under the rug and ignored more often than not.
One of the obscure Gospel passages loosely tied to the Christmas story that is never discussed at Christmas is in Matthew 2, part of which I included above. After the Magi had visited Jesus and his parents, Herod proceeded to slaughter all of the boys in Bethlehem in an effort to eliminate the newborn King of the Jews. I believe that God's heart was broken then just as much as it was a week ago Friday. The slaughter of innocents is nothing new, is always tragic, and always breaks God's heart.
I have a deep sense of sadness and grief this Christmas, partly due to these recent events. But also partly due to the grotesque commercialism that has engulfed Christmas. It seems that this season is all about greed and excess, instead of a time to celebrate God's gift of His son Jesus to the world. It should be a time to gather with family and loved ones and cherish each other during this particularly dark time of year. Christmas was never supposed to be about presents and decorations and parties, but that's what it has become for so many, especially in this country.
Regardless of whether you have children, I encourage you to take some time this week, especially on Tuesday, to let your loved ones know how much you appreciate and care for them. I know that there are a bunch of people in Connecticut who wish they could tell their little ones how much they love them just one more time, but won't have that luxury.
May you have a blessed and peaceful Christmas. And remember that Jesus is the reason for the season.
Pastor David
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Now What?
"I
know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I
have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation,
whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength."
Philippians 4:12-13
On Wednesday, November 14, 2012 I lost my job. No, I didn't misplace it. I was politely informed by the president of my company that my position had been eliminated and my services were no longer required. Just like that, I became a statistic and joined the ranks of the unemployed.
I was last unemployed in 1988, so it's been quite a long time since I had to look for work or be concerned about how I was going to pay my bills or put food on the table. In fact, I was recruited by my past two employers (including the one that just let me go), so I haven't even had to look for a job in 24 years.
Needless to say, my circumstances have changed dramatically since the last time I was jobless. In 1988, I was 26 years old, rented an apartment, owned a used vehicle for which I paid cash, and only had myself to be concerned about. Today, I am 50 years old, I own a home with a first AND second mortgage, drive a car that I just purchased last year with 42 more payments outstanding, and I have two additional mouths to feed. Plus, I have accumulated a lot more "stuff" and a lot more debt over these past 24 years. In a nutshell, my life is much more complicated now than it was in 1988.
The fact that I am 50 years old and have spent my entire professional career in banking doesn't exactly make my job prospects rosy. For starters, employers prefer to hire younger workers, not because they are better, but because they are cheaper. When you spend over 29 years in your profession, your salary tends to hit the high end of the spectrum. In addition, the entire banking industry continues to compress as more and more small community banks close or sell out to larger regional and national banks. It is estimated that up to 25% of the banks in operation at the beginning of the recession will have disappeared due to failure, merger or acquisition by the end of 2015. That's a lot of banks. And a lot of bankers losing their jobs and crowding the market looking for work.
I am coming to terms with the idea that I may never work in the banking industry again. The bulk of what I did was very specialized, and every bank only needs one of me, or does without the luxury of someone dedicated to those functions. The fact that I own a house that is currently under water due to the collapse of the real estate market means that I am not free to pick up and relocate to another part of the country where my job prospects might improve. Unfortunately, most of the jobs currently available that would provide a comparable salary require skills and/or education that I do not possess.
I was blessed to receive a reasonable severance package from my employer, so I have enough to live on between that and my savings for about 4 months. After that, I either will need to have a job that provides a decent income, or I will need to start pulling money out of my retirement (something that I really would rather not do for a multitude of reasons).
With all of that said, I see several options:
1) Go back to school and get the education and skills necessary to work in an industry that is stable and/or growing (how to pay for school and my living expenses in the interim remains an unknown);
2) Take any job I can find, which will probably mean that my income will not meet my expenses, and eventually my savings will run out and I either drain my retirement accounts or declare bankruptcy;
3) Start my own business (not sure exactly what, but it would have to have minimal start-up costs and be profitable within a year); or
4) Win the lottery, which is probably not going to happen (especially since I don't play)
I have been kicking around these options (well, the first three) with a few close friends for the past couple of weeks, and don't have any clear answers as of yet. I'd like to go back to school if I could figure out how to pay for it and still keep my home, but that would take at least two years just to get an associates degree, and then there still is no guarantee of employment at the end of the day. Whatever I do, I don't want to lose my home now that I have two dependents that I have to provide for. If it was just me, I could deal with a drastic lifestyle change. But I have to live someplace where my "kids" can have a comparable quality of life. If you're not a pet lover, you wouldn't understand, but that's okay - God still loves you. ;-)
The strange part about all this is, since the moment I was laid off, I have had an overwhelming sense of peace. I am not consumed with worry or fear about the future. I'm not obsessing about what will happen when the money runs out. I admit that I have had to fend off a spirit of discouragement, but I think God and I are winning that one. I am regularly reminded about Paul's confession in Philippians 4, and can relate all too easily. Before these past several years of plenty, I had many years of need. Yet no matter what my circumstances, God always provided what I needed and I was able to find contentment in them. And if God does not change, then I have no reason to expect that somehow He will fail me this time around.
What lies ahead? I don't know, but God does. My job for the moment is to be patient and wait on Him to unfold the next chapter of my life. There are so many more variables than what I have listed here - who knows what might happen just around the corner.
Normally, my blogs are supposed to provide something uplifting and encouraging for my readers, but today I just felt the need to express some of what I'm going through, more for me than for anyone else. But if you find any comfort or strength from what I have shared, then that is a bonus.
They say that as soon as you stop changing, you die, so I look forward to the changes that I will encounter in the coming weeks and months. I look forward to the surprises that God has prepared for me, waiting to delight me in ways my feeble human mind could never imagine. And I look forward to sharing these exciting events with you, my friends.
Have a blessed week!
Pastor David
Philippians 4:12-13
On Wednesday, November 14, 2012 I lost my job. No, I didn't misplace it. I was politely informed by the president of my company that my position had been eliminated and my services were no longer required. Just like that, I became a statistic and joined the ranks of the unemployed.
I was last unemployed in 1988, so it's been quite a long time since I had to look for work or be concerned about how I was going to pay my bills or put food on the table. In fact, I was recruited by my past two employers (including the one that just let me go), so I haven't even had to look for a job in 24 years.
Needless to say, my circumstances have changed dramatically since the last time I was jobless. In 1988, I was 26 years old, rented an apartment, owned a used vehicle for which I paid cash, and only had myself to be concerned about. Today, I am 50 years old, I own a home with a first AND second mortgage, drive a car that I just purchased last year with 42 more payments outstanding, and I have two additional mouths to feed. Plus, I have accumulated a lot more "stuff" and a lot more debt over these past 24 years. In a nutshell, my life is much more complicated now than it was in 1988.
The fact that I am 50 years old and have spent my entire professional career in banking doesn't exactly make my job prospects rosy. For starters, employers prefer to hire younger workers, not because they are better, but because they are cheaper. When you spend over 29 years in your profession, your salary tends to hit the high end of the spectrum. In addition, the entire banking industry continues to compress as more and more small community banks close or sell out to larger regional and national banks. It is estimated that up to 25% of the banks in operation at the beginning of the recession will have disappeared due to failure, merger or acquisition by the end of 2015. That's a lot of banks. And a lot of bankers losing their jobs and crowding the market looking for work.
I am coming to terms with the idea that I may never work in the banking industry again. The bulk of what I did was very specialized, and every bank only needs one of me, or does without the luxury of someone dedicated to those functions. The fact that I own a house that is currently under water due to the collapse of the real estate market means that I am not free to pick up and relocate to another part of the country where my job prospects might improve. Unfortunately, most of the jobs currently available that would provide a comparable salary require skills and/or education that I do not possess.
I was blessed to receive a reasonable severance package from my employer, so I have enough to live on between that and my savings for about 4 months. After that, I either will need to have a job that provides a decent income, or I will need to start pulling money out of my retirement (something that I really would rather not do for a multitude of reasons).
With all of that said, I see several options:
1) Go back to school and get the education and skills necessary to work in an industry that is stable and/or growing (how to pay for school and my living expenses in the interim remains an unknown);
2) Take any job I can find, which will probably mean that my income will not meet my expenses, and eventually my savings will run out and I either drain my retirement accounts or declare bankruptcy;
3) Start my own business (not sure exactly what, but it would have to have minimal start-up costs and be profitable within a year); or
4) Win the lottery, which is probably not going to happen (especially since I don't play)
I have been kicking around these options (well, the first three) with a few close friends for the past couple of weeks, and don't have any clear answers as of yet. I'd like to go back to school if I could figure out how to pay for it and still keep my home, but that would take at least two years just to get an associates degree, and then there still is no guarantee of employment at the end of the day. Whatever I do, I don't want to lose my home now that I have two dependents that I have to provide for. If it was just me, I could deal with a drastic lifestyle change. But I have to live someplace where my "kids" can have a comparable quality of life. If you're not a pet lover, you wouldn't understand, but that's okay - God still loves you. ;-)
The strange part about all this is, since the moment I was laid off, I have had an overwhelming sense of peace. I am not consumed with worry or fear about the future. I'm not obsessing about what will happen when the money runs out. I admit that I have had to fend off a spirit of discouragement, but I think God and I are winning that one. I am regularly reminded about Paul's confession in Philippians 4, and can relate all too easily. Before these past several years of plenty, I had many years of need. Yet no matter what my circumstances, God always provided what I needed and I was able to find contentment in them. And if God does not change, then I have no reason to expect that somehow He will fail me this time around.
What lies ahead? I don't know, but God does. My job for the moment is to be patient and wait on Him to unfold the next chapter of my life. There are so many more variables than what I have listed here - who knows what might happen just around the corner.
Normally, my blogs are supposed to provide something uplifting and encouraging for my readers, but today I just felt the need to express some of what I'm going through, more for me than for anyone else. But if you find any comfort or strength from what I have shared, then that is a bonus.
They say that as soon as you stop changing, you die, so I look forward to the changes that I will encounter in the coming weeks and months. I look forward to the surprises that God has prepared for me, waiting to delight me in ways my feeble human mind could never imagine. And I look forward to sharing these exciting events with you, my friends.
Have a blessed week!
Pastor David
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